040 VOICE LIST SIXTEEN
Nov. 1st, 2013 07:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
deadliestviper[Coming out of her first death toll (first real death toll; those times on the Mirror Barge don’t count), Beatrix is in bad shape. Everything hurts and she’s moving much slower than normal, shivering from a cold that just won’t go away. But there are things to be said, news to be shared, and they won’t wait for her to feel better. When the audio clicks on it catches nothing but a breath of air, the sound of hair brushing fabric and skin. Then a throaty voice, hoarse, one straining to sound as normal as possible:]
I want to apologize for everything my other self did. [She pauses; she wishes she could say she’d never done it, but in a sense she hadn’t. She wishes she could say it sickens her to see what her other self is capable of, but all the crimes were those she’d committed before.
Maybe all she can say is that she’ll never do it again.]
I won’t ask anyone to trust me after that. But if any of the people I hurt need satisfaction, whether in the form of words or blood, they’ll have it.
Just make it quick, please. I have unfinished business at home.
Private Messages
[Cecil, Vin, and Bond, separately]
We need to talk. [Mostly about how you’d better not be like that normally.]
[Arya]
I am not happy with you.
[Anya and Ben]
Please know that in my right mind I’d never would do anything to hurt either of you. You don’t have to believe it, but I need to say it.
[Zack]
I… Thank you. Thank you so much. For everything.
And I’m so sorry for trying to kill you.
[Friends and Family]
I’m sorry, again, about what I was.
I don’t know why, but I just – graduated. [She sounds supremely confused about this. Yes, Mirror Barge taught her two lessons, that death is cruel but can also be merciful, that war isn’t always the way to go. They seem like such simple truths, but they’re difficult to realize.] I’m going home. If you’re up for it, I’d like to see you before I go.
I want to apologize for everything my other self did. [She pauses; she wishes she could say she’d never done it, but in a sense she hadn’t. She wishes she could say it sickens her to see what her other self is capable of, but all the crimes were those she’d committed before.
Maybe all she can say is that she’ll never do it again.]
I won’t ask anyone to trust me after that. But if any of the people I hurt need satisfaction, whether in the form of words or blood, they’ll have it.
Just make it quick, please. I have unfinished business at home.
Private Messages
[Cecil, Vin, and Bond, separately]
We need to talk. [Mostly about how you’d better not be like that normally.]
[Arya]
I am not happy with you.
[Anya and Ben]
Please know that in my right mind I’d never would do anything to hurt either of you. You don’t have to believe it, but I need to say it.
[Zack]
I… Thank you. Thank you so much. For everything.
And I’m so sorry for trying to kill you.
[Friends and Family]
I’m sorry, again, about what I was.
I don’t know why, but I just – graduated. [She sounds supremely confused about this. Yes, Mirror Barge taught her two lessons, that death is cruel but can also be merciful, that war isn’t always the way to go. They seem like such simple truths, but they’re difficult to realize.] I’m going home. If you’re up for it, I’d like to see you before I go.
private
Date: 2013-11-01 02:59 pm (UTC)It's strange. New. Worse, in many ways, but part of that is the death toll.
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Date: 2013-11-01 03:04 pm (UTC)[A few minutes later, she knocks sharply on Beatrix's door.]
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Date: 2013-11-01 03:10 pm (UTC)When she hears the knock the door swings open and she steps aside to admit Abigail.]
Are you armed?
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Date: 2013-11-01 03:38 pm (UTC)I'd have to be an idiot not to be at this point.
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Date: 2013-11-01 03:52 pm (UTC)[She nods to the desk. Sitting on it is a sheathed dagger, plain-looking and old, scavenged from Lakeside.]
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Date: 2013-11-01 04:23 pm (UTC)Why are you giving this to me? Are you going to tell Ben?
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Date: 2013-11-01 04:30 pm (UTC)Do I need to tell Ben?
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Date: 2013-11-01 04:41 pm (UTC)[She rubs her arm reflexively and looks away.]
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Date: 2013-11-01 04:46 pm (UTC)[Bea stays silent, prompting Abigail to go on. But when she doesn't, she changes the subject.]
Were you hurt?
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Date: 2013-11-01 05:03 pm (UTC)He let Anya make Dean skin me. Just - [She holds out her fingers a few inches apart.] A little. A smidge.
And I didn't fight back.
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Date: 2013-11-01 05:05 pm (UTC)Oh.
Slowly, she nods.]
Are you going to hurt them?
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Date: 2013-11-01 05:26 pm (UTC)That doesn't mean I don't want to.
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Date: 2013-11-01 05:53 pm (UTC)It's right that you want to.
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Date: 2013-11-01 06:00 pm (UTC)But I can't. If I was going to it would be someone who deserved it more.
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Date: 2013-11-01 06:02 pm (UTC)spam
Date: 2013-11-01 06:08 pm (UTC)spam
Date: 2013-11-01 06:24 pm (UTC)spam
Date: 2013-11-02 03:20 am (UTC)[A knee-jerk response: it's hers. She wants to end it. But - she breathes in. Out. Settles.]
Maybe. I have to think about it.
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Date: 2013-11-04 06:19 am (UTC)