deadliestviper | 040 VOICE LIST SIXTEEN

[Coming out of her first death toll (first real death toll; those times on the Mirror Barge don’t count), Beatrix is in bad shape. Everything hurts and she’s moving much slower than normal, shivering from a cold that just won’t go away. But there are things to be said, news to be shared, and they won’t wait for her to feel better. When the audio clicks on it catches nothing but a breath of air, the sound of hair brushing fabric and skin. Then a throaty voice, hoarse, one straining to sound as normal as possible:]

I want to apologize for everything my other self did. [She pauses; she wishes she could say she’d never done it, but in a sense she hadn’t. She wishes she could say it sickens her to see what her other self is capable of, but all the crimes were those she’d committed before.

Maybe all she can say is that she’ll never do it again.]

I won’t ask anyone to trust me after that. But if any of the people I hurt need satisfaction, whether in the form of words or blood, they’ll have it.

Just make it quick, please. I have unfinished business at home.

Private Messages

[Cecil, Vin, and Bond, separately]
We need to talk. [Mostly about how you’d better not be like that normally.]

[Arya]
I am not happy with you.

[Anya and Ben]
Please know that in my right mind I’d never would do anything to hurt either of you. You don’t have to believe it, but I need to say it.

[Zack]
I… Thank you. Thank you so much. For everything.

And I’m so sorry for trying to kill you.

[Friends and Family]
I’m sorry, again, about what I was.

I don’t know why, but I just – graduated. [She sounds supremely confused about this. Yes, Mirror Barge taught her two lessons, that death is cruel but can also be merciful, that war isn’t always the way to go. They seem like such simple truths, but they’re difficult to realize.] I’m going home. If you’re up for it, I’d like to see you before I go.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Ellie's fine. She did what Bea told her, and beyond that, she just hid. She didn't want to face consequences for blowing up the kitchen, didn't want to know if anyone got caught in the blast or blaze, and didn't want to provoke anything else.

So she's just a little messy when she opens the door. Not injured.

She hangs back, wondering if giving Bea a hug would be too much - something. ]

Graduation. [He offers the mug.] Congrats.

Oh - thank you.

[Whether she means the congratulations or the cocoa, that's not clear. The hot drink warms her hands and she breathes in the steam, letting it waft over her face, before taking a long drink.

If there's someone she can confide this in, it's Riddick, and she leans casually against the doorway. Still, she does not quite manage to met his eyes.]

It's strange. After all that, I don't want anyone here dead.

[It's not. For a second Beatrix stands in the doorway, equally unsure, then leans down and sweeps Ellie into a tight hug. She sucks in a breath of air, suddenly shaky, all but clinging to her.]

Thank you.

I know she is.

[A beat.]

Does she remind you of yourself, too?

Yes.

[Blinking slowly, Abigail nods. Then she grins, bright and brittle.]

He let Anya make Dean skin me. Just - [She holds out her fingers a few inches apart.] A little. A smidge.

And I didn't fight back.

Edited 2013-11-01 17:04 (UTC)

[Oh.

Oh.

Slowly, she nods.]

Are you going to hurt them?

[He nods, frowns-- his brow wrinkles as he tries to put it into words.]

You get... Tired of it. Knowing it won't solve anything.

Then she'll be more powerful than the power she knows. That's good.

No. [This is absolutely true. Incomplete information, but true.] It wasn't Ben. It wasn't Anya.

That doesn't mean I don't want to.

[She has not been remotely comfortable, thinking about what's happened. It hasn't torn her up, but she's been laying on Nymeria since they could retreat back to their cabin. She doesn't try to ignore the message, but it does trigger her ire, raising her hackles before the fight even starts.

It puts her on the defensive.]

I'm not going to say sorry. That wasn't me.

I'd rather not.

[He's drunk: it's not immediately evident. He's being facetious but at the same time, there is weight in his voice. He's trying to escape dwelling. Talking doesn't make it easier.]

Did you ever doubt that?

And what about Dean?

It's right that you want to.

I'm very tired.

And I'm going home to kill three people.

No. Not at all. I just meant it's good that she knows you. There are different kinds of strength. Not all of them are beautiful.

[She is, and Beatrix is. Beautiful, dangerous, ruthless, and strong.]

[He nods at that, too.]

Then get some rest.

[The discomfort is not something that goes just one way, but it dissipates when Arya replies so stoutly. It makes Beatrix smile. That's the one she knows.]

I know, and I don't expect you to.

Have you ever done that before?

Believe me, this isn't a walk in the park for me either.

[He's not getting out of it that easy.]

Dean didn't have a choice. It was him doing that or Anya doing worse. He made the best bad choice.

But I can't. If I was going to it would be someone who deserved it more.

It's the worst thing, isn't it. To be hurt and unable to do anything about it.

No. Not for me. It's close, but the real worst thing is not even being able to try. Not wanting to. Just - giving up and knowing it'll never end.

What do you need to hear?

I will.

It's just, I still want these three dead. I still know they deserve to die. That didn't change. I always thought it would.

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040 VOICE LIST SIXTEEN

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